Modest is Hottest…I Protest!
First off, does anyone else think the expression “modest is hottest” is kind of lame? I mean if the word “hot” is generally in reference to people and their sex appeal, does the saying not defeat the purpose of modesty to begin with? I get what people mean when they express it, but the phrase is kind of an oxymoron if you think about it. Surely we could come up with something better?
It has been around a month since I wrote my first blog on modesty. I am not sure if it is because I invested too much time thinking about modesty or the flood gates finally opened on a collective of thoughts formed in my mind over the years; no matter what the case may be, I find myself thinking and noticing far more than what I had before, regarding modesty. The message of modesty is like trying to yell when you are hoarse or have little voice at all. The words are coming out, but nobody seems to hear them. Some choose not to listen, while others humor you with the hope that you will eventually stop. At the same time you have those who know modesty is a problem, who recognize the effects of immodesty, yet they give into it anyway. It is at this point doubt arises in my mind, is the battle for modesty really worth fighting? If the current dress is all part of the cultural norm, if even Christianity allows goes along with the modern dress code, should I just get over myself and accept it? I know in my heart of hearts, and my mind of minds, the answer is no, but where do you go from here? As a male talking about female modesty, there is not much one can do.
Change the Freaking Record Already, Right?
When I think of the effects of immodesty I like to pretend as if I have a daughter. I do not have one, but this is pretend, anything is possible in this hypothetical world. Anyway I imagine I have a daughter. Sadly I have been on the front lines when it comes to hearing how males think and respond to females, especially those who “give them something to look at”. Much of this has come from the mouths of Christian men (they still have the flesh too.) Even more sad a fact is, I used to be one of them. If I had a daughter, knowing how guys think, knowing how I once thought, I would do everything in my power to keep her from dressing or presenting herself in a manner that objectifies herself. The same thing goes for a wife. If I had a wife and she dressed in a way I knew other men were objectifying her you better believe I would say or do whatever was needed to deal with it. That same feeling of sadness, of doing whatever I can keep them from those experiences, is the same feeling I get when I see a sister dressed immodestly. Now apply that to God. You have a father in heaven who hates to see you see yourself like that, to be objectified. This is not to sound corny, but it is true. We may not always feel like God is with us or cares, but He does, and the last thing He wants is for you to be treated, to act, like a cheap object instead of His creation, a creation of infinite worth.
Why is the Word “Pink” Written in Blue?
Let me say this. I DO NOT GET IT, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO DRESS IMMODESTLY, WHY?! If you can present an intelligent argument, addressing every moral, social, and practical issue, convincing me immodesty is not really immodest, I will drop everything I believe on the matter. Meaning, you probably will not, at least from a Biblical point of view, you are welcome to try though. What does wearing your shorts short accomplish, that wearing them a few inches lower world not?! What in the world feels so good about wearing a second layer of skin, showing the world the extent of your anatomy from the waist down or up?! What about clothing that most of the time is nowhere near the color “pink”, but exclaims it is “pink” often on places such as the backsides and other parts of your body. SHEESH! You might as well wear a neon sign that says “LOOK AT MY BUTT!” A flashing neon sign at that. Does it feel good to have guys look at you?! Are you overwhelmed with feelings of value to know men are lusting after you?! You may say “oh you are just being extreme”, yet with each passing day I am reassured that I really am not! Our culture is becoming sexually desensitized, no matter where you look, to the point that even children are becoming conditioned for immodesty. Go to any clothing site that sells children’s clothes and you can find short skirts, tight jeans, legging for pants, short shorts, and that is just the beginning of it. Start them young right? I just do not get it! In the words of Charlie Brown “GOOD GRIEF?!” What is it all for? To the people that matter, to those in Christ, it really is not impressive. Anybody can reflect the world in how they dress, that’s easy. If you want to dress truly different, truly unique, dress in a way that reflects Christ. I mean either Victoria is a gnostic or she is running out of secrets.
You Set the Tone
“The fact that I am a woman does not make me a different kind of Christian, but the fact that I am a Christian does make me a different kind of woman.” ― Elisabeth Elliot
Wasn’t she a stud? Oops a studess?! Oh, Word says “studess” is not a word. Seriously though, the beacon of Christ that was Elisabeth Elliot was absolutely astounding.
I am not a woman, nor do I claim to be one, in case you have not figured it out. The things you guys deal with, I could never do it. I do understand it may be hard to act different, to dress different, but who said doing anything for the sake of Christ was meant to be easy? While, I as a male, may not have the same problems you do, I still have my fair share of hard things I have to do on a daily basis. We are in this together, equal yet different. This problem is not unsolvable, there is a solution, yet few choose to do anything about it. We as Christians, men and women are called to set a tone, to be different, yet we eat right out of the hand out the world, then wonder how the heck Christianity is so fat and secularly gluttonous. We are what we eat. The solution is to change your heart, and to dress in a manner that reflects your change. Where is your heart before God in how you dress? Does what you wear reflect a heart for Him or a heart for the world? Are you depending on fulfillment from other people by how you dress and act, or are you looking for it in Christ? Again this is not about legalism, but respect for yourself, the body God gave you, the people who surround you and your position in Christ. Likely, this will not be easy, but it most certainly will be worth it.
I care. Why do I care? That really is a good question. Topics such as modesty have not normally been topics I have crusaded for. If you know me, you know that I am not one of those typical, sappy, soft spoken, Christian dudes, who try so hard to look genuinely interested what you have to say, only to spout the spiritual answer you want to here, because he actually sees you and every sister as a potential wife. I know, I know, run-on sentence, but what I said there could be said in no better way. I care about modesty because God cares about modesty. I care about you because Christ in me cares about you. To simply put it, I am just some guy trying to walk with the Lord, hoping and praying that you do so too. My motives are not to impress or woo you, if I wanted to do that I picked a poor subject to do so. Let me just plea. Think about modesty, think about how you dress. If affects men and if affects you. Ladies you do not need to show off your body for love or approval, in Christ you have that, so why seek it from sources where ultimately you do not? Your goal in this life should be Christ alone, and if that is your goal those who matter, meaning those who are walking in Him, are all you truly need.
If no other man in the universe respects and cares for you, especially those of you who are in Christ, know that there is at least one out here that does and it is only through Him that I or anyone can do so. You are valuable as a person, not an object.
For Further Reading on “Modesty” Check out My Previous Post!